Helping a Loved One with Drug Addiction

The number one thing I would say is don’t enable. I know that a lot of parents or loved ones will try to give everything they can to help. In reality, all it does it hurt the one in active addiction.

We need consequences for our actions. We need to hit rock bottom to recover. Everyone’s rock bottom is different.

I think back to when my mom finally wouldn’t give in to my addiction anymore. No more help. No more driving me around. No more picking up the pieces for my actions. She was done. She took the keys to my car. Wouldn’t allow any of my family members to drive me anywhere to get any drugs. She told me the next step for me in life was prostitution and homelessness. That was a huge eye opener for me.

Over the next week. I couldn’t drive anywhere to find any drugs or sell my own prescriptions to make money. I called my drug dealer and he delivered what would be my last bag of fentanyl to me. I overdosed twice in that week. Hit my rock bottom.

I finally had no more options. No more money. No more dope.

I begged and pleaded with my grandmother, my brother, and my mother to please drive me and just give me twenty dollars. I was in such deep of withdrawals. Hadn’t eaten in hell probably over a week. Barely drank any water. And was 100 pounds. Just to kind of paint the picture.

I know it had to of been so hard for them to see me so helpless begging an pleading like that. But at that time. I cared about only one thing. My next fix.

They didn’t give in. This is the most important part of my journey to recovery. THEY DID NOT GIVE IN TO ME. THEY WERE NOT COSIGNING MY BULLSHIT ANY LONGER.

I laid in bed for days not able to even consume liquids. My grandmother had came into the room to check on me and couldn’t find a pulse. My heart was going out from malnutrition. She called 911. And that’s when I received help. I was done. I had exhausted all options. My family wasn’t giving into me anymore. And I knew it was death or recovery for me.

I just want all parents, grandparents, loved ones that are dealing with someone in active addiction. Enabling is the worst thing that you could do. I know that you love them and its a heart-wrenching time to watch that. But when you give in to our shit… It’s just that much longer until we recover.

I received help in a mental health ward. I had to have special medical attention and went into a medically induced coma for several days. It’s hard. All of it is hard. But the harder part would have been continuing on the way it was. I wouldn’t be here typing this right now. I wouldn’t have had a story to tell. I would be dead.

I often reflect on what my life would have been like if someone would’ve intervened and locked me in a psychiatric ward 10 years ago. Would my life have turned out different? Would I not have lived through all of the years of active addiction that I did? Who really knows…

I’m so thankful for my mother. Who finally said enough is enough.

It’s never too late for anyone. And I personally don’t think its ever to early to intervene. If you notice the slightest sign. INTERVENE RIGHT AWAY.

I can’t imagine having to watch a child suffer with addiction. But I will say that if my daughter ever decides to pull any of this shit. I will lock her up in a psychiatric ward faster then she could blink.

It’s not cruel, It’s life saving.





2 responses to “Helping a Loved One with Drug Addiction”

  1. DonnaMarks Avatar

    I remember those days and how scared we were. Thank God you got to the hospital and got the proper treatment. The programs you became a part of afterward was absolutely the best. You have become a spokeswoman for them and I expect you’ll be doing more of that. You speaking your truth and and being brutally honest about addiction and recovery is helping so many people. I Thank God you are here to tell your story.
    Love you

  2. Vanessa Avatar

    Yes as a parent it was hard not to give in because in the beginning you don’t realize you are enabling and what that really entails. It wasn’t until I learned more about addiction that helped me understand that it is the very worst thing you can do although trust me when I say it is heartbreaking and very hard to say the least! I can’t tell you how much I regret giving in for so long and wonder if I hadn’t if it would have saved you from so much. I’m sorry for my shortcomings! I thank God for your recovery and words can’t express how proud I am of you in so many ways!! I know your story is going to continue to inspire others in addiction & recovery as you very much inspire me with your words! I would encourage all parents and loved ones going through this to educate yourselves on addiction and do not wait to intervene!

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