I remember one night looking in the mirror, I felt as if my life was over, a living hell. My reflection told me someone else lived within this body – not myself. The skin beneath my fingertips had lost its feeling. My body looked lifeless. I did not recognize myself. Nor cared to. I ran a bath. I made the water so hot. Hoping it would get hot enough to burn me once I sunk my soulless body in it… That I would feel something. Anything.
I hated myself. I hated who I was… I hated who I had become. I was disgusted. So, numb inside that nothing was comforting to me. Besides the idea of death. This may seem dramatic but that was my reality.
Looking back, I can hardly believe that was me. The devil had a tight grip and all I wanted to do was break free from the chains of addiction; yet every time it seemed like freedom would be in sight, it kept pulling me right back into the living hell. It felt as if any hope of leading a clean life – or even just survival – were slipping away with each passing day. In desperation, accepting my own death by overdose began to feel almost comforting… until some spark inside lit up enough strength for one final try at redemption against impossible odds!
It’s hard to shake off a past that has been full of suffering. Sometimes we can get too comfortable and think ourselves better, but it’s important to remember how quickly life could change in the blink of an eye. With this reality in mind, I always want to live each day with intention – God must have had a plan for me all along!
So here goes let’s look into our own reflections today and feel contentment instead of resentment; let us not be deterred by any adversity nor obstacle on our way as there are greater things awaiting just beyond them if only, we take those first steps towards actualizing goals and dreams. Life is precious yet so fleeting – don’t waste another moment going round-and-round feeling unfulfilled or unsatisfied because everything you need lies within reach ready at your fingertips!
When I look in the mirror now. I love the person that I see. It’s possible. Stay Strong.
As the Michael Jackson goes… Let’s start with the Man in the Mirror
“I’m starting with the Man in the Mirror. I’m asking him to change his ways. No message could have been any clearer if you want to make the world a better place take a look at yourself an make the change.”